“We were together, I forget the rest.” – Walt Whitman
Mental and relational health are about creating a balanced and fulfilling life where we understand and care for ourselves, connect with others, and navigate life’s challenges with resilience and hope. Using my deep understanding of relationship dynamics and advanced training in evidence-based practices, we will work together to create the wonderful life and/or secure relationship you have longed for.
Couples Therapy
In couples therapy, we will improve your communication, resolve conflicts, enhance emotional connection, address unmet needs, strengthen relationship skills, navigate life transitions, and build trust and security. Making a meaningful difference in people’s lives by building stronger, healthier relationships is profoundly rewarding and inspiring.
My approach to couples’ therapy draws primarily from Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), which emphasizes that negative patterns of interaction lead to misunderstandings and unmet needs. The interaction is the enemy, not you, not your partner. I will help you learn how to work together to combat the cycle and stop combatting each other.
I also use Gottman Method Couples Therapy, a method backed by 50 years of research, to help couples strengthen their friendship, foster a positive perspective, and constructively manage conflict. The Gottman Method improves intimacy and reduces conflict by teaching couples how to enhance their communication, express appreciation, and navigate disagreements effectively. You will learn concrete tools that you can rely on to help you stop fighting and communicate effectively.
Before couples therapy, negative patterns of interaction leave relationship needs unmet, leading to emotional disconnection and conflict. Unmet attachment needs – such as the need for reassurance, support, closeness, appreciation, and to be understood and seen in a positive light – contribute to not only relationship distress, but personal distress. This is not pathological, it is human. In our work together, you will learn how to express your needs and respond to your partner’s needs in ways that bring you closer together rather than further apart. EFT has a 90% success rate in alleviating relationship distress. Following EFT, you will feel a sense of safety, security, and emotional closeness in your relationship.
We will create new emotional cycles in your relationship by addressing your needs with clear and authentic communication, helping you connect rather than fall back into your pattern. You will also learn how to respond to your partner’s needs in ways that break you out of your pattern and finally lead to resolution; your partner will learn to do the same for you. By helping you understand your patterns and address your emotional needs, you will develop a deeper understanding of yourselves and each other, enhance your relationship skills, and create a more fulfilling and resilient partnership. After couples therapy, you will have the experiences and tools to navigate your relationship challenges with confidence and compassion.
Individual Therapy
I help individuals looking for help with anxiety and stress management, depression, trauma, self-esteem and personal growth, relationship issues and intimacy, career and life transitions, and mindfulness and emotional regulation. Beyond addressing these problems, emotional well-being involves the ability to understand, express, and manage emotions healthily and constructively. In our work together, you will develop the capacity to cope with life’s challenges, bounce back from adversity, and maintain a sense of hope and optimism. I will help you develop healthy thought patterns, self-awareness, and insight. We will work to build meaning and purpose in your life, along with rewarding social connections. As you notice positive changes in your life, your self-efficacy, or belief in your ability, will grow.
My approach to individual therapy is collaborative, tailored to each client’s unique needs, and leverages evidence-based techniques such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT). I take a holistic approach, working with you to improve the emotional, cognitive, social, and physical aspects of your life to achieve overall well-being. You will learn skills and practical strategies to reach your goals. By fostering a collaborative relationship, exploring emotions and thought patterns, and providing practical strategies, I aim to help clients achieve their goals and enhance their quality of life.
More About Me
My clients describe me as a deeply warm, nonjudgemental, and empathetic therapist who provides insightful feedback and practical strategies. Clients appreciate my ability to genuinely understand and connect with their experiences and emotions as well as build a strong sense of trust and safety with them. Most important to me is that my clients feel heard, validated, comfortable, and cared for in our sessions.
In my free time, I like to read, spend time outdoors, exercise, as well as cuddle and play with my Great Dane, spend time with family and friends, and travel. I especially like anything involving water, including swimming, boating, paddleboarding, or just sitting on the beach.
Specialties
- Couples experiencing communication breakdown, conflict and disagreements, emotional disconnect, trust issues, and life transitions
- Individuals looking for help with anxiety and stress management, depression, trauma, self-esteem and personal growth, relationship issues and intimacy, career and life transitions, and mindfulness and emotional regulation
Education
- Master of Science, Human Development and Family Studies with a Concentration in Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT), Colorado State University
- Bachelor of Science, Psychology, Colorado State University
Advanced Clinical Training
- Intensive Course in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): Attachment-Based Interventions for Couples in Crisis with Dr. Sue Johnson
- EFT Tango Mastery Training with Jonathan Zalesne, LPC
- Gottman Method Couples Therapy Advanced Training with Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman
- Collaborative Assessment and Management of Suicidality (CAMS) Certified
Contact me to schedule a free consultation or a session (I offer in-person sessions in Fort Collins or online sessions anywhere in Colorado):
Mary@marriagecounselingfortcollins.com
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